ugg

well.. it seems that uncontrollable circumstances have forced my hand.
Before i can do any more school to pursue ANY path I have bills to pay. I have 4500 in credit cards dating back to my stupidity in my first years of college, a computer that is STILL not paid off, and I have to pay off my 10k line of credit that my parents keep telling me is causing them too much stress because they are co-signers. (Kicking myself for going to private school for half of university... though still happy I did) Toppled on to this is the 30k I owe in osap and the couple hundred dollars I owe to a few friends...and you see why I feel like I’m drowning. I can’t even consolidate to lower interest rates because I’ve been late on a few payments. I’m sending half my paycheck home but something always comes up to chip away at what I send. (like the recent bank holiday that cost me 75 bucks in nsf charges cus the money was stuck in transit) tie this up with the fact that though I LOVE Japan and want to stay here... it is too expensive to live here when I loose half my paycheck. I THINK I can have my credit cards payed off by the February... and so I’m going to go home for a month and then move to Korea where it is cheaper to live and where I’d make more money.
It sucks when your 25 and you know your going to have to put your life on hold for a few more years... especially when all your friends are already on their way or have arrived to where they want to be...
Of course only things of the future and finances are bad. Life here is good. I have a good girlfriend, good friends, and am keeping up with my philosophical readings. But, to be sure, I can’t wait until this cloud is no longer over my head....